Thanksgiving 2013. I never thought I would be where I am now at this curent time in life. I am finding myself more and more and just thinking about the things in life that matter. The things you may take for granted when your wrapped up in work or relationships or other nonsense, the little things do matter.
Tonight has been such a great night. My girls got along so good, like perfectly. I love watching them express themselves in how they talk and make pictures. We all made turkeys out of our hands and laughed. We made air pop popcorn, listened to funny music, cuddled til we literally almost feel asleep on the couch in one big pile. That feeling you cannot buy anywhere. The feeling of unconditional love with your children. I secretly audiotaped the girls just asking them questions like, if I was 90 and you were 60, what would we do. One says drink coffee and sit in a rocking chair....watch tv. Grace says I will come and see you every day. It amazes me how smart children are really. I remember being small and thinking some people were born without feelings and I felt bad for them and would pray for them.
The most heartfelt thing that has happened to me today is I asked the girls what they were thankful for and it literally made all my tears come out of my eyes afterwards. They were NOT even in the same room and said almost the identical answer. They both said, "My family, my friends, my teacher and God and Jesus". The innocent and sweetness of them just makes me overwelmed at times. There is so many small things they do to be nice like organizing shoes or clearing the table or rubbing my feet with lotion. They get it. The small things DO matter. To make others smile and be happy makes yourself feel the same way inside.
What am I thankful for? Oh so much...first and foremost, my children. God and his unconditional love, my family, my close friends, my aquaintances. My dog, my kitty. The co-workers, the management in the places I work. The girls dad and his wife, the strangers that you meet. The smiles and laughs from people you see. Life is good. It really is. You can always choose...to see if your glass is half full or empty. Most days mine is overflowing. I love helping and caring when I am able to. I love seeing people smile and laugh and thankful for the people that have confided in me after reading some facebook status or blogs saying I helped them with situations or the people I have spent some time with talking with. That makes me feel good. I love making a difference in a positive way.
Life is a journey. Be the best version you possibly can. God is always watching and loving all the little things you do to make someone else --just a bit more thankful.
Blessed beyond words!
Love Always,
Bambi
Wednesday, November 27, 2013
Monday, November 18, 2013
Bambi: Honest & Just Me!
I don't know what prompted me to start writing just now. I just have the urge to say a lot of things that I have in my mind at the moment that are way to much for a Facebook status.
Life is crazy and full of crazy people. That should about sum it up. I have lots of thoughts and observations, so much sometimes it's overwhelming. I read about today a man who was in a teaching position that put his own semen on cookies and blindfolded kids and made them eat them, I watched a youtube video and news report on kids now that go around playing this knock out game which affects innocent bystanders. It's sickening how the world is now. It really is. There is a lot of good things too. Just wow, today is so much different than before.
I love when people ask me how did I get to where I am now. People are always growing on a consistent basis. How am I always so happy? I'm not, always. I'm most sad when my pretty daughters are away from me. They say and do the most amazing things that make me feel like I'm way younger than I am. Which is 24 in case your wondering, wink. I think first and foremost I have learned from my past, which I have learned, accepted and moved on. I have before.... let it completely consume me to become a person I am not. I a few years ago became a sad person. So sad I almost didn't think I could even deal with life. I had a very bad time. I awoke one day with a brand new lease on life and looked through the windshield and not the rear view mirror any more. There becomes a time in your life when you realize it is all the little things. It sounds like a quote or a saying on a rock, but it's very true. The little things are the things that people think about most often. A action like a single flower or a love note on a sticky note to someone. A out of the blue kind gesture far is remembered more than a holiday gift. People matter. More than work, more than social media, more than texts. It's truly back to basics. Love others like you want loved back.
A person once asked me a thoughtful question, this person I most recently talked too. A outgoing, attractive person I don't know well, but what I have gathered is unique and thoughtful. What kind of life would you choose to live if you had a choice and why. This did make me think quite a bit. I have a twisted view of that. I guess I would say I would choose the life I have now. Why??? I could have chosen the easy path of happiness and wealth. Would I have valued that as much as the one I have lived. NO way. I have always worked very hard in my jobs. I started working when I was 14 years old. All my life I have always had two and three jobs. Not always because it was because of the money. I helped a elderly lady for a few years, laundry, housework...I helped her so much. Her picture still remains on my bedroom dresser. She made a huge impact in my life. She had the best stories. Like her kids including sons jumping up and down on her chenille bedspread all with bright red lipstick of hers. Their laughter was most important to her, I retained and carried that with me in my heart.
I was the oldest of four kids, because my older half sister lived elsewhere. I learned you should be the leader and not the follower. I was not popular in school, but not hated. I just was me. Same as I am now. I did what I thought was right. That is one thing I am happy I have always been. True to myself. Although when it came to relationships with men, so not the case. I let them change me into who they wanted, because I then thought about them more than myself. Even typing that makes me frown, like WHY would I do that? There is an easy answer. I cared more about others than I do myself, also I didn't value me as a equal. I'm a caring person and I love to help others.
I have had a lot of time to think about what do I want out of life. That part is simple and will remain a priority because I love myself and I need to make myself a priority too to a certain extent. I want to be happy genuinely. I want to smile and laugh and always think of my glass full or overfilling. I want to live as thought each day as it's last. I want to continue to compliment strangers. Be nice to the people that others are mean to because they are different. I want to know God watches my every move. I want to live as though I'm on tv and my every move is recorded and there is nothing secret. I more than ever know that I'm pretty damn amazing and I'm fabulous and I am a wonderful mother and friend and I will continue to live my each breathe as though it's my last. Life is too short for drama and sadness and what ifs. Throw away your rear view mirror and look out your windshield. Life is too beautiful.
Love Always,
Bambi
Life is crazy and full of crazy people. That should about sum it up. I have lots of thoughts and observations, so much sometimes it's overwhelming. I read about today a man who was in a teaching position that put his own semen on cookies and blindfolded kids and made them eat them, I watched a youtube video and news report on kids now that go around playing this knock out game which affects innocent bystanders. It's sickening how the world is now. It really is. There is a lot of good things too. Just wow, today is so much different than before.
I love when people ask me how did I get to where I am now. People are always growing on a consistent basis. How am I always so happy? I'm not, always. I'm most sad when my pretty daughters are away from me. They say and do the most amazing things that make me feel like I'm way younger than I am. Which is 24 in case your wondering, wink. I think first and foremost I have learned from my past, which I have learned, accepted and moved on. I have before.... let it completely consume me to become a person I am not. I a few years ago became a sad person. So sad I almost didn't think I could even deal with life. I had a very bad time. I awoke one day with a brand new lease on life and looked through the windshield and not the rear view mirror any more. There becomes a time in your life when you realize it is all the little things. It sounds like a quote or a saying on a rock, but it's very true. The little things are the things that people think about most often. A action like a single flower or a love note on a sticky note to someone. A out of the blue kind gesture far is remembered more than a holiday gift. People matter. More than work, more than social media, more than texts. It's truly back to basics. Love others like you want loved back.
A person once asked me a thoughtful question, this person I most recently talked too. A outgoing, attractive person I don't know well, but what I have gathered is unique and thoughtful. What kind of life would you choose to live if you had a choice and why. This did make me think quite a bit. I have a twisted view of that. I guess I would say I would choose the life I have now. Why??? I could have chosen the easy path of happiness and wealth. Would I have valued that as much as the one I have lived. NO way. I have always worked very hard in my jobs. I started working when I was 14 years old. All my life I have always had two and three jobs. Not always because it was because of the money. I helped a elderly lady for a few years, laundry, housework...I helped her so much. Her picture still remains on my bedroom dresser. She made a huge impact in my life. She had the best stories. Like her kids including sons jumping up and down on her chenille bedspread all with bright red lipstick of hers. Their laughter was most important to her, I retained and carried that with me in my heart.
I was the oldest of four kids, because my older half sister lived elsewhere. I learned you should be the leader and not the follower. I was not popular in school, but not hated. I just was me. Same as I am now. I did what I thought was right. That is one thing I am happy I have always been. True to myself. Although when it came to relationships with men, so not the case. I let them change me into who they wanted, because I then thought about them more than myself. Even typing that makes me frown, like WHY would I do that? There is an easy answer. I cared more about others than I do myself, also I didn't value me as a equal. I'm a caring person and I love to help others.
I have had a lot of time to think about what do I want out of life. That part is simple and will remain a priority because I love myself and I need to make myself a priority too to a certain extent. I want to be happy genuinely. I want to smile and laugh and always think of my glass full or overfilling. I want to live as thought each day as it's last. I want to continue to compliment strangers. Be nice to the people that others are mean to because they are different. I want to know God watches my every move. I want to live as though I'm on tv and my every move is recorded and there is nothing secret. I more than ever know that I'm pretty damn amazing and I'm fabulous and I am a wonderful mother and friend and I will continue to live my each breathe as though it's my last. Life is too short for drama and sadness and what ifs. Throw away your rear view mirror and look out your windshield. Life is too beautiful.
Love Always,
Bambi
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